Less than a week ago, a part of my heart and mind were filled with thoughts of a potential relationship with a certain guy. I’ll use the term “potential” loosely, since he was not seeing the potential. He recognized how much we had in common and how much we enjoy each other’s company. We both noticed that we think alike in many instances. And I could really see our passions, talents and plans being compatible. He understood this, but didn’t connect it with a romantic interest in me. He saw us as great friends. The truth is, I didn’t really have romantic/attraction feelings toward him; but the commonalities drew me to him in a major way.
About one month ago, we’d talked and agreed that we would both keep an open mind about our friend/relationship; that we’d pray for the Lord to change one of our hearts. Of course, I mentally placed more emphasis on his change than my own.
Funny how the Lord works.
Monday, through no effort of my own, I just wasn’t thinking about him that much. When I did think of him, it was to realize that I wasn’t really thinking about him.
Previously, I’d asked the Lord not only to remove thoughts of him, but to strip away ANY desire to replenish those thoughts and feelings. I have a tendency to do that: wake up not feeling warm and fuzzy, but then work to bring those feelings back. It always works. This time, I didn’t even want to do that!!!
Don’t get me wrong: this is a great guy, just perhaps not great for me. If he were, then we’d probably be together right now, or in the near future.
Where did the feelings go? Stay tuned…